writing – Charlie Jordan's Website

1st January 2024

New Year things & being made from 30% cheese…

January Greetings. I hope this finds you well, as we begin another orbit around the sun.

I couldn’t sleep, so was wide awake at 6am, reading in bed. I opened the curtains at 7.30am and marvelled at how light it was, as the Winter sun hadn’t risen before 8 all week.

I decided this was a good sign for the first morning of 2024 – more light. I walked into the kitchen, and it was still pitch dark outside and I wondered why was it so light in the bedroom?

Because I’d left the reading lamp switched on, that’s why! My tiny brain had forgotten this…

Years ago, I’d scribble a giant list of New Year Resolutions, determined that this year I would finally tidy my flat, get all the piles of paper organised and filed correctly. I’d do a yoga video each morning and never eat chocolate again. You can tell by the word Video, that this habit goes back decades…

The usual rigid self improvement stuff that we expect will transform us on the strike of midnight.

Over the years, we grow older and a hopefully tiny bit wiser. Kinder to others and to ourselves, and perhaps more realistic. I’m now gentler with my own shortcomings, more accepting of reality.

I’m a slightly disorganised, extra tall human who is just doing her best. Phew. Perhaps the same for you?

Although you may not have been called ‘giraffe’ at school…

Most of us are just doing our best, and sometimes we’ve got way too much to deal with, for any of this self improvement lark.

So give yourself a break from that pressure this New Year.

Instead of a long list of rigid new rules, just choose one simple thing that you do each day, and aim to really pay attention when you’re doing it. Something small that you already do, like drinking a morning cup of tea. Or cleaning your teeth. Or the washing up.

Then when you perform this daily task, gently bring your full attention to it. Use all your senses to notice what that actually feels like today, in this moment. It might be different tomorrow.

Appreciate the warmth of the mug on cold hands, the aroma as tea brews, the shape of the bag bobbing around, the soothing of morning tastebuds as you sip, and the nourishing feeling of a good cup of tea.

When we pay attention with all our senses engaged, it heightens pleasure and it tastes better.

If you do that, you’ll bring yourself into the freshness of a moment, without the baggage of everything else that can weigh you down. It’s simple, but not aways easy.

We’re used to endless thoughts & worries swishing around our mind, like scrambled eggs in a washing machine. By focusing attention, we turn down the volume on the worries for a welcome respite.

Try it, and see what it’s like.

Drinking a morning cup of tea can be a cherished ritual when we drink it like this, and we can chill out in a precious few moments of peace.

Immersing ourselves in a simple activity can become an act of mindfulness. Just one tiny thing. That’s all. Easier than forcing yourself to sit cross legged in silent meditation for hours, frustrated that you’re not in a Zen like state.

Instead of giving up chocolate, we could choose to relish the melting flavours of a few squares of dark chocolate. That can be more satisfying than wolfing down half a tin of Quality Street while watching Netflix. I’ve tried both, so trust me on this…

Another thing you could try, is to join a monthly Mindfulness & Writing Zoom. Whether you’ve always wanted to write something, but never find the time; or if you’re just keen to explore life, the universe and everything just a little more in 2024, without having to leave the sofa!

Each month’s session is unique mix of creative bursts of inspiration, where we explore new ideas, and follow our first thoughts with curiosity, never judgment.

Giggling is encouraged, as we take our practice lightly, and you’ll find a warm welcome from our regulars, in a small friendly group.

No experience of Writing or Mindfulness is needed, just bring yourself and a pen and paper. And perhaps a cup of tea, as we’ve been focusing on tea today…

Beginners bring their cherished Superpower of ‘Beginner’s Mind’, there’s no hierarchy, and never any pressure to share the words you write in a session. Although it’s always a privilege when someone does read their freshly squeezed words, and we appreciate them.

Each session is for 90 minutes and we close with a relaxing and restoring meditation.

‘Like a Lamp, Ladder and Lighthouse’ is how one writer described the benefits of our Zooms, one said they felt ‘nourished’, and ‘part of a special community of friends’. Another said, ‘I’m amazed at how much I write in just 5 minutes & I’m loving writing again.’

We relish the pleasure of making marks on the page, as you find your own voice, with the confidence to write. You’ll be in awe of your own thoughts & ideas that tumble onto the page.

So I hope you can join us and enjoy discovering your own natural creativity, and practice some Mindfulness techniques that help in daily life, along with a sense of light and hope. Each month we’ll also explore a couple of brilliant poems to seed new ideas for your own response.

To find out more about sessions, just message me via the Contact page on the website. There’s one on Sunday January 14th at 10.30am, and one on Monday January 15th at 7pm. (UK time)

Well that’s enough typing words for New Year’s Day. I’ll wish you all the best for 2024, with a few leftover festive treats in the fridge. I’m now made from 23% carbon, 30% cheese and the rest is definitely chocolate…

I’ll leave you with the wonderful poet Nikita Gill’s words, you might like to write your own response based on your festive feasts:

“We have calcium in our bones, iron in our veins, carbon in our souls, and nitrogen in our brains. 93 percent stardust, with souls made of flames, we are all just stars that have people names.”

I’ll just squeeze in a picture of cheese. I’ve never tried it with pomegranate though…

Photo by Aliona Gumeniuk on Unsplash

12th May 2023

Cake & being Human…

A little confession, I don’t always practise this Mindfulness stuff. Sometimes I eat while watching TV & mindlessly scrolling my phone. Maybe you’ve done the same? We’re all human, just bumbling along and doing our best. But then we switch back into paying attention to the richness of the present moment, and it can be lovely!

I was in Brighton last week, walking though the Lanes when I took a bite of a raspberry & pistachio cake. It was ridiculously delicious, and I relished that first perfect mouthful. Then a blur of white feathers that felt like a clumsy angel brushing past my face, and it vanished.

The cake and a seagull both gone in a split second.

I laughed, as the timing was impeccable and what else can you do? After checking that the seagull hadn’t left a Jackson Pollock deposit on my shoulder, I relished the typically ‘Brighton Experience’ of having a seagull steal my cake, with the stealth of an angelic ninja.

I’m so grateful that I’d fully appreciated that first bite, and hadn’t just wolfed the cake down while scrolling my phone & watching TV. It was all quite gentle, I didn’t see a sharp beak or beady eye, and no talon scratches to leave a mark. Just a soft blur of feathers and an empty hand.

In some traditional Zen stories, the master will slap the student in the face or pour cold water over them to hasten their enlightenment. Perhaps the seagull was my teacher, pushing me back into the present moment with a sneaky cake theft…

(I should also confess that in my short Brighton trip, I’d already eaten half my body weight in cake & chocolate, so by this point, perhaps the seagull was doing me a favour!)

When we’re away from home, it can be easier to ease back into a Mindfulness habit. In fresh surroundings we can be more aware of the present moment, and less caught up in the usual worries.

Or perhaps you find this easier when cooking, gardening, or walking the dog? Hopefully at some point in your daily life you relax into just ‘being’ and not feeling as though you’re like Atlas, holding the world on your shoulders, and trying to care for everything & everyone at once.

Sometimes it’s those moments when we’re slightly delayed & forced to wait that we can choose to take a few deep breaths that ground us back to the present. Finding a way to welcome the slow traffic lights, or the laptop freezing, or our loved ones taking ages to get ready. A tiny minute of peace, if we can relax into the moment & notice the world around us.

Most of us can’t do this 24 hours a day, but these tiny gaps in our schedule are worth looking out for and practising just chilling out and being calmer. It’s better for our blood pressure and well being, and helps us find a little space in a crowded world.

Although I lost my cake, I decided that it gives me another reason to return to Brighton. The Open Bakery in Kemptown, in case you’re passing through…. Just wait till you’re indoors to nibble the cakes.

A good way to return to this state of naturally being in the moment is to join a Mindfulness & Writing Zoom. It’s a welcoming & friendly space, whether you’re a beginner or a more experienced writer. We’ll meander through some interesting new creative ideas, enjoy bursts of inspiration for quick scribbles, practise simple mindfulness habits and then relax with a meditation to unwind. Cake is optional…

For May our dates are Sunday 14th May 10.30am – 12pm and Monday 15th May 7pm – 8.30pm. Contact me if you’d like to join one. I promise no seagulls will be in the Zoom!

13th February 202213th February 2022

Valentine tips: Writing about Love. What I’ve learned as a Celebrant, Poet & Radio Presenter. And why a pineapple is the perfect love token!

As a Celebrant, I listen while people light up, telling me their real life Love stories. Then I write them into bespoke ceremonies & rituals that mark the big transitions in our lives.

It’s such a privilege.

Like Love, it also comes with a responsibility.

To tell their true Love story and for it to touch the heart of each person gathered. We might catch a glimpse of our own love reflected in the words at a wedding, turning to snuggle our beloved, while testing our waterproof mascara…

Love spreads like this. I would say Love is ‘contagious’, but given recent events let’s think of Love as spreading like the aroma of baked apple pie with cinnamon freckles. Or freshly cooked chips with a vinegar top note. Delicious.

Maybe you or your partner don’t like apple pie or chips, but what do you love instead? Details matter, they make things personal and real.

So think about the one you love…what’s their favourite smell, or taste? Which song do they sing aloud to on the radio? If the words you write capture some details, it will help to make the message unique & the recipient feel special.

You’ve noticed them. We all love to be noticed, and seen & heard.

Years ago, I used to present late night Love Zone radio shows, which meant sifting through hundreds of hand written letters from listeners every week. (In the dinosaur era, we didn’t have email or texts.)

Real life love stories were stuffed into each envelope. Sometimes 3 identical letters with requests for different names, but all from the same person, declaring to each, ‘You’re the only one for me’. Being truthful is a good idea with love stuff, so you can guess where those letters ended up…

Some stories were messy & complicated, but over 7 pages of green biro scrawl, the depth of feeling was clear. Love really can be ‘The Sweetest Feeling’ as the Jackie Wilson song goes.

We always had far more letters than time in the shows to share their story, so had to choose which dedications made it to air. Some stood out clearly, often thanks to the details which made them come to life.

For your Valentine, write something personal, that only they will get. You don’t need to be Ed Sheehan or Warsan Shire, but if your partner loves the work of a singer or writer, you could quote from them.

If your first date was at the cinema, write a soppy message quoting a line from the film on a home made ‘cinema ticket’ & stream that film.

Talking of films, if you’re in love, first think about your ‘Meet Cute’, Hollywood speak for how a couple first meet. I love asking couples about how they met. They don’t always have the same answer… but you can usually see their faces change. They often blush and sneak flirty glances at each other with a beaming smile, or a filthy laugh!

Maybe just thinking about when you met your beloved has changed how you feel now, softening into a smile widening across your face as you remember.

Tap into that feeling as you pick up a biro to scribble a few thoughts down… anything you remember from those first blushes of love?

What did you notice about this person? Maybe you were nervous & had that awkward self conscious teenager feeling, despite being 42? Or you fell off a chair & talked about how giraffes have the largest hearts of all land mammals?

That was me on all counts. Luckily he didn’t run away.

Be yourself. If you haven’t scared them off already, with clumsiness & talk of giraffe hearts, then they like you just as you are. One of the sexiest things Mark Darcy said to Bridget Jones in that film, that he liked her very much, ‘Just as you are.‘ Swoon.

‘To thine own self be true’, as some scribe from Stratford wrote. Having watched ‘Upstart Crow’ on TV., I now only see David Mitchell as William Shakespeare.

If someone loves you, then they want YOU to shine through any words you write.

So write what you’d say to them. If you’re not a natural silver tongued wordsmith, but put up amazing shelves & always do the washing up, then write about that, as your way of showing love.

There’s a book about the ‘5 Languages’ of Love, the first of which is ‘words of affirmation.’ But there’s probably 5 million different ways we demonstrate our love. All can be amazing. But writing a line or two about what you love about that person is going to result in a warm glow for your beloved.

For advertisers, 14th February is all about expensive bouquets of flowers, chocolates & champagne. But it can be about pineapples & onions.

Bear with me here…

I remember a Grook poem from Danish mathematician & scientist Piet Hein, I read it on the bus to school one day & it’s tattooed in my memory. It’s short & sweet, like all the best poetry, as my non-poet friends say…

‘Love is like a pineapple

Sweet and undefinable.’

So you could write that on a card, and give your love a pineapple, saying ‘I pineapple you.’

A memorable Valentine, and you can serve fresh slices of pineapple, then compost the skin for zero waste.

Or how about gifting your beloved an onion?

Bear with me again…

There’s a poem called ‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy. It begins, ‘Not a red rose or satin heart. I give you an onion. It is the moon wrapped in brown paper…’

Search it online & quote her to your Loved one. Then chop & cook the onion later in the week. Romantic dinners often start by caramelising an onion…

The poem goes on to talk of ‘Its’ platinum loops that shrink to a wedding ring, if you like.’ An original way to propose!

If this year’s Valentine’s Day leads to a proposal, as a Celebrant, I’m always thrilled to listen to a real life love story. We could even use an onion or pineapple in your ceremony, perhaps to hold the ring?!

My Aunty Doreen got married on Valentine’s Day. Her prudent husband thought it a good way to remember the date for anniversaries & save on extra cards or flowers each year!

A heartfelt post-it note & breakfast in bed can work wonders, so no need to splash the cash. Or a bar of Montezuma’s dark chocolate with orange & geranium, sublime flavours & £2.50 from our local shop. That’s my traditional Valentine treat. Hopefully my hairy viking partner has already got one stashed away ready.

That’s another thing – don’t expect your partner to be a mind reader. They’ve probably got a lot on their plate already & it’s not been the easiest couple of years lately. So a huge act of love is not putting pressure on the one you love to plan epic or expensive surprises, lovely though they might be. Instead you could just talk about Valentines or any other time of the year & what you’d both like to do.

Happy Valentine’s, however you’re celebrating it this year. In a relationship or happily single, I hope you feel a glow of all the love you’ve had from family, partners & friends through the years. Tuck it close to your heart, and in remembering the details, it might sneak a smile from the inside out.

And perhaps treat yourself to a delicious pineapple.

p.s. A real life love poem is below, commissioned by Julie Boden for ‘Love in Leamington’. It mentions all true life details, from thread veins to the Giraffe heart thing. Music by the outstanding Steve Tromans. Excuse me waddling like a duck, buying a red dress on a whim just before the gig wasn’t my smartest idea, given that I don’t usually wear dresses. You see, be yourself – I should have known!